College of Idiots: Stepping Away From Ledge For A Minute To See the Cubs In AZ (But Still Wearing My Ledge Jumping Shoes)

Maybe don't throw yourself off a ledge until we are at least 50 games into the season. The Cards just aren't as good as they have been playing and the Cubs aren't as bad as they have looked the last 3 games.

This was Angry's comment to my post last Thursday after the Cubs lost their first series of the year to the Reds. Well, it didn't get much better. It's okay when the Bears haven't won in a week, but it's a little more depressing when your Cubbies haven't won in a week. I'm not saying I was on the ledge, but now I'm on the rooftop.

It's okay, we'll get him back for what he did you to you tomorrow.

After Saturday's game was blacked out for the rest of the country including AZ, and since John forgot to send his private jet to pick up the Idiots for the First Ever WAIW Pub Crawl, we reconvened at Lazy's Sunday morning to watch the Cubs return to glory and finally win a game. As we all know, the Cubs are hurtin' a little bit, but the scrubs managed to not fuck up too much, Harden was back with Hard-On stuff, and K-Fuk had the best birthday ever (even better than my 13th birthday when I got a Game Boy).

Yesterday was Fukakke Time!

How much did you love that smile from Lou when Harden plucked Pujols in the Poo-hole? Classic Pinella.

Now Pujols has an excuse for that huge bruise on his ass.

So I woke early today, grabbed my Cubs jersey and headed off to work, excited to know that later tonight I would be joining local celebrities to see the Cubs take on the home-boy D-Bags. Or so I thought. Apparently, there is this little X-Men Origins: Wolverine Premiere in Tempe tonight, so the crowd might be a little sparse. I mean, who can resist Huge JackMan? But the Idiots won't be blinded by the shiny lights of Hollywood and I won't be heading over to Tempe Market Place to go ShamWow Guy on Ryan Seacrest...

ShamPOW, right in the kisser!

...and proclaim my undying love to Scarlett Johansson (it's a little hard when the courts have forced you to stay 1/2 a mile away).

Scarlett Johansson gives us just another excuse to show hot girls on COI

At 4:30 local time, I will depart from my job at an undisclosed location in the Phoenix area, be picked up by a friend and travel to Jackson's on Third, where I will meet up with Angry and Lazy who will no doubt be three sheets to the whim as they have taken the day off to start the partying early. That is of course if they manage to navigate the trip from Mesa to downtown Phoenix via the new-fangled Light Rail, which must be exactly like going to a Cubs game back home...NOT! Then after a couple brews and traditional Irish Car Bombs, we will head into Chase Field to watch Ramirez, Marmol, Lee and Bradley take on the D-Bags.

Oh yeah...we will head in to watch Miles, Johnson, Hill, and Hoffpauir take on the D-Bags. Wait, is it Spring Training again? Where is the Shark? There he is. I knew he couldn't stay in IA forever.

Whatever. Anyways, the TLFC should be proud that we will be there to root, root, root for Cubbies, if they don't win it's a shame. Hopefully it will be as exciting as last year, which saw TRL get an RBI and steal third in a rare win in the desert. Then tomorrow we get to see Mount Zambrano erupt on AZ and the two other Idiots will be lucky enough to go to the day game on Wednesday (work is SOOO overrated).

So put the kiddies to bed, grab a sixer of Old Style, and be prepared to not go to sleep till tomorrow, cause the Cubs are back in the Valley of the Sun. The Idiots will be there...will you? (That is if you haven't already jumped off the ledge.)

Go Cubs!