If you have 10 minutes to spare between surfing Craigslist for cheap Depends Adult Diapers and looking at balloon-popping fetish porn, check out the video below. This is My Milwaukee!
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The Big Pour, featuring the new Budweiser American Ale. Woo-hoo!
I like beer! I even heart beer! As Benjamin Franklin once said, “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.”
On Saturday, November 22nd, 2008, Draft Magazine sponsored the first annual "Big Pour" Beer Festival. What does this have to do with the Cubs you ask? Well, I'll tell you. The festival was held at Hohokam Stadium in Mesa. Yep, the same place the Cubs play their spring training games.
The festival was actually held on the field as well. I got to stand where D-Lee fields those double plays when not hitting into them. I graced the mound where Mark Pryor threw 13 consecutive perfect simulated games. I stood in the box where Todd Hundley prepared himself for the 2002 season. I sat in dugout, although couldn't remember if the Cubs usually sat in the traditional 1st base dugout or the 3rd base dugout, so I sat in both of them.
The festival was all-in-all a success. A little better planning would have made it much better though. First off, there were hardly 100 breweries as advertised. Most of the beers I had already had, and who hasn't tasted Corona, Guinness or "ugh" Budweiser American Ale. There were a handful of breweries with beers I hadn't tasted before, and these were usually the ones that were looser with the "4 ounce pour" rule.
Lazy Steve does not like you!This morning, the Securities and Exchange Commission filed the civil charges in a federal court in Texas. The agency accuses Cuban of selling 600,000 shares of Mamma.com, the Internet search company, using material but non-public information.
Cuban responded the only way a true American should, through his blog, BlogMaverick.com. Well, he didn't respond, his lawyers did. Cuban was already pretty much completely eliminated from the buying the Cubs, even though he is the fan favorite and reportedly put in the highest initial offer.
I don't see the Cubs being sold before the beginning of spring training, if even at all before the end of the 09 year. Fortunately, this means little for Cubs front office, which will continue to pursue new players to fill the voids when Dumpster, Wood, and Hank White are gone.
GFY Bears! I hate you Bob Babich, I want you back Ron Rivera. McNabb and other veteran players on the Eagles didn't know you could tie? Really? Even I knew that, and I know shit about football. You sir, are our COI Idiot of the Moment!
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Good evening everyone! I know it has been a while since my last post but now seemed like a good time to throw some commentary out there.
How about the Kerry Wood situation? I have to admit, I am not happy to see him go. I suppose it's the true Cubs fan in me. It's kind of like that wife who cries when her old man, who kicks her ass nightly, leaves her. I have no doubt Kerry wanted to return to the Cubs but giving that guy a multi-year contract would be a disaster. I honestly can't remember the last time he put together two "full" seasons together. Gregg will be a welcome addition assuming they don't try to have him close. Marmol should hit the bill nicely. Despite his electric stuff last season, Kerry Wood blew 6 of 40 saves. Marmol should improve on that number and the money saved by not signing Wood should help pay for either Peavy's 2009 salary or whatever left-handed stiff they find to hit in the lineup.
Zambrano won ran away with the Silver Slugger award for NL pitchers. Shocking I know. Balls.
The Peavy trade rumors aren't dying and it looks like the Braves might be pulling themselves from the running. I don't care if they find a lefty for the lineup, a rotation of Peavy, Zambrano, Harden, Lilly, and Marquis would pretty much gaurantee a division championship in 2009....barring injury (knock on Wood....all puns intended....).
In non-Cubs related news...
The Bears have a HUGE game against the Packers tomorrow. I will be watching my final game from Hawaii and will be making my triumpant return to the weekly rediculousness near Riggs and Linsday next weekend. I can hardly wait. Lets hope the Bears step up and put some distance between themselves and the only other team I feel has a legitmate chance of winning the NFC North.
College basketball is finally starting so I can forget about the Boilers shitty football season. Hey, at least we beat Michigan!
OUT!
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The big news in Cubdom, and across Cub blogs everywhere is that Kerry Wood will no longer be a Chicago Cub. The news was broke by Hendry after the Cubs acquired closer Kevin Gregg from the Florida Marlins for Jose Ceda. This has since sent shock waves the size of Prince Fielder's ass throughout the blog-o-sphere. Let's see who is sad that Kerry is leaving:
Diary of Mad Cubs, A Hundred Next Years, Wasting Away in Wrigleyville, Desipio, Cubbie Nation, A League of Her Own, Cubby-Blue, Bleed Cubbie Blue, Ivy Chat, CUBblogging, and I'm sure many more to come.
My thoughts? Fuck him. Kerry is a selfish, heartless, washed up loser who should have been gone long ago and has kept this organization in the dumps for the past 10 years (and former COI Idiot of the Moment). He was the only starter left of the god-forsaken '98 team and his leaving ushers in a new era into the Cubs being able to win a World Series. He should have crawled away like he wanted to after '96. He should skipped the last game of the season this year, got in his car and drove to Milwaukee or St. Louis, where I will be overjoyed to see him playing in next year.
Let's do a brief overview of the douche-baggery that Kid K has caused the Cubs over the years:
1998:
On May 6th Kerry throw a one-hit, 20 strikeout shutout, tying Roger Clemens for the most amount of strikeouts in a 9-inning game. Other highlights of the day (lifted from Wikipedia) include "breaking Bill Gullickson's single-game rookie record of 18 strikeouts in 1980. According to statistician Bill James's Game Score system, which attempts to assign a numerical value to a start, Wood's performance scored 105, the highest in the history of baseball." Oh yeah, did I mention it was only his fifth professional start?
What a fucking dick? Come in like you own the place, throw nothing but blazing fastballs and strikeout everyone. And then you fall to pieces. You're like girl that you start dating that is fucking sexy and skinny as hell and then when you fall in love and get married she turns around and sits on the couch all day, scarfing down Cherry Garcia and watching Tyra in her sweat pants. Thanks for all the hype and showing off Kerry. Fucking Dick!
1999:
Kerry who? Where were you then, huh? Oh, I got a bum elbow and can't play. Fucking Asshole!
2003:
Game 7 of the NLCS. Kerry starts off by pitching okay and helping his own cause by hitting a home run, but then, just like that tasty Volcano taco he comes back to produce a shit-storm. Wood took the loss in the game, effectively ending any hope of the Cubs winning a World Series in this century. Cocksucker!
2007:
After mediocre pithing and a billion trips to the disabled list, Wood signs for a one year contract with the Cubs for a bargain price of $1.75 million. Wood explained at the time he felt he owed both the Cubs' Organization and their devoted fans for all the time missed due to his injury plagued past. You know what's a bargain? $0.79 Ranch dressing at the 99 cent store. Kerry continued to be plagued by injuries and gave us this doozy:
"The Cubs activated Wood from the 60-Day Disabled List on August 3, causing many to believe that he would make his actual return on that day.[5] In the seventh inning, however, Lou Piniella opted to send Bob Howry to the mound, and most fans, eager to see Kerry back on the hill, mistakenly gave Howry a standing ovation, only to realize moments later it was actually not Wood."
Fucking dick. Making us cheer for Brown-spot Bob. That's like sticking your dick in the glory hole and getting the best head of your life only to find out afterwards it's your former gym school teacher who just had his lips wrapped all over your shlong. Kitten Fucker!
2008:
Despite being offered numerous long-term deals, Kerry continues to tease the Cubs and signs for another one-year at $4.2 million dollars. Kid-K makes the transition to the bullpen, forcing Cub fans to have to deal with Ryan Dumpster and his goofy Harry Caray impression and stupid glove dance in the rotation. We all see how well that turned out. Plus he managed to extend a blister injury into a month long vag-douching. And he flipped the bird on national tv. Way to be a role model. Fucking Fuck Face!
Well no more. No more Kid K. Burn your "I got Wood" t-shirt and don't look back. All you cry-baby blogs can go to hell. Oh, yeah, anybody remember being forced to watched this crap?
Way to go Kerry. No wants to go bowling for charity. Bowling isn't fun. Unless you're the Dude, Walter or Donny. How about strip-tease for charity? Now that's something I can get on board with.
So GFY Kerry "Kid K" Wood. Get the fuck out of Chicago. Good riddance.
Bear Down!
*Btw, if you made it all the way to the end of this without wanting to kill me than you are a douche. It's called SARCASM! We will miss you Kerry and good luck wherever you land (unless that is Milwaukee or St. Louis). Hopefully like Gracey and Mad Dog before you, you will get a ring. You will always be a Cub in our hearts!
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Congratulations 'Merica, you just voted in a White Sox fan (and Cubs fan hater i.e. COI Idiot of the Moment) as your next President. With the news, prices of crystal meth skyrocketed as fans celebrated all around Chicagoland, depleting resources.
I'm kidding. Regardless if you're a Democrat or Republican, Independent or Felon (in which case, where was you're vote last night?) Tuesday was a historic step for the U.S. It will be one of those memories you tell your kids and grandkids about when they ask about why it was so hard for a person of color to become the leader of the free world.
Just as today we take for granted black players in baseball, there always has to be a start. On April 15th, 1947, Jackie Robinson debuted for the Brooklyn Dodgers to become the first African-American major league baseball player of the modern era. Robinson took his responsibility with class, respect, and did his job everyday for 10 years, regardless of his color. And on April 15, 1997, the 50 year anniversary of his debut, Major League Baseball retired Robinson's jersey number 42 across all MLB teams in recognition of his accomplishments both on and off the field in a ceremony at Shea Stadium.
Personally, I never thought America would be willing to vote in a black president for this election. I still see racism and bigotry everyday. But the message was clear on Tuesday night, racism in this country is losing to a younger and more educated population. I'm too young to have experienced the racial tensions of the 60s. I can't say I know how it feels to be a black person in America, but I am proud that I finally do live in a country where everyone can become who they want to be, regardless of their race.
So congrats, President-Elect Barak Obama. Just don't expect us to cheer for you when you trade sides and become a Cubs fan when they get to the World Series next year. Only beautiful people allowed.
Bear Down! USA!
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So I think it's finally safe to come out of hiding. October is over. November is here. The Bears are in full effect and with the win yesterday are at the top with sole possess of the NFC North. Unfortunately it wasn't a very pretty win, and the Bears have lost their new leader, fellow Purdue alumni (to Angry Mike, my fellow alumni is special-teams-specialist G-Wolfe!), and Neck-Beard spokesmodel, Kyle Orton for a month with a high ankle sprain. So it looks like the Bears will need to use Sexy during what is arguably the most important stretch of games of the season.
Sexy looked okay yesterday, not spectacular, but didn't make too many mistakes, basically just a couple overthrown balls. On the defensive side, the Bears looked good, then horrible, giving up 23 points in the second quarter, and then good again. Of course it was the Lions. The injury bug also hit with Mike Brown going down with a reoccurring "sandy vagina."
In other football, on Saturday I actually watched 2 decent games. First, God refused to let me start cleaning the house by forcing me to watch an epic 4+ hour battle between Notre Dame and Pitt. It was an awesome game which ended boring as hell with a field goal kicking contest going to Pitt in the 4th overtime. The primetime game between Texas and Texas Tech was also pretty exciting, with the Red Raiders knocking off the Longhorns with a final second touchdown. And final second was exact, as with only 1 second on the clock, the Lubbock TX crowd rushed the field 3 times, resulting in two unsportsmanlike conduct penalties. Texas Tech then had to kick off from their own 7-yard line, but still won the game.
So after the exciting World Series matchup between Philly and Tampa Bay, we might get to see Alabama vs. Penn State for the BCS Bowl. I can't wait!
In Cubs news, Dempster is exploring his free agency and will probably not resign with the Cubs. That's just my opinion though, and if Hendry can get Peavy, I don't think it will be that bad of a lose. D-Ward is also shopping around, but with a lackluster season I can see him being resigned. Blanco was also not picked up on his option, but look for the prison-tat catcher to be back next year to backup Geo again.
Well, it looks like General Manager meetings are heating up. Sorry for the lack of links and pictures on this post, I'm too lazy today. Look it up yourself, motherfucker, it you need to know more. Maybe I will post again soon, maybe not. GFY!
Bear Down!
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