I thought I would single you jackoffs out for costing the NL the World Series home field advantage.
Let's start in reverse order, just for shits and giggles.
Bug Selig, this damn game should have ended 1.5 hours ago and shouldn't have counted for anything. Instead, a bunch of scrub NL reserves botched the game. GFY. This is by far the stupidest thing you have done in a tenor full of dumb ass mistakes. I am sure every fan and manager out there was excited to see their players out there until 1:30am.
Corey Hart, thanks for having a puss arm. I am not blaming you for losing the game. I am blaming you for not extending what I was hoping would be a painfully long game. Had this thing went 20 innings Pud would have been forced to rethink the stakes of the game and Joe Madden would be on his way to NY to kick the shit out of Terry Francona. Instead, Bud may have ammo to prolong things and Terry is still a genius. GFY.
Let's start in reverse order, just for shits and giggles.
Bug Selig, this damn game should have ended 1.5 hours ago and shouldn't have counted for anything. Instead, a bunch of scrub NL reserves botched the game. GFY. This is by far the stupidest thing you have done in a tenor full of dumb ass mistakes. I am sure every fan and manager out there was excited to see their players out there until 1:30am.
Corey Hart, thanks for having a puss arm. I am not blaming you for losing the game. I am blaming you for not extending what I was hoping would be a painfully long game. Had this thing went 20 innings Pud would have been forced to rethink the stakes of the game and Joe Madden would be on his way to NY to kick the shit out of Terry Francona. Instead, Bud may have ammo to prolong things and Terry is still a genius. GFY.
Dan Uggla, thanks for sucking. I thought Christian Guzman was the worst NL all-star but you proved me wrong. You are TERRIBLE on D and you choke in clutch situations. GFY assface.
Finally, Clint Hurdle. WTF were you doing pulling Aramis for a pinch runner. He was arguably the most dangerous fucking hitter you had left. It is no wonder your team that seems to have tons of talent sucks so bad. Seriously, made me pine for Ned Yost tonight. Thanks for wasting 4 strong innings of Cubs pitching you dick. GFY.
Oh, I almost forgot. A bonus GFY goes to Tim Lincecum. Poor baby was "sick". Yeah, meanwhile Dempster, who pitched 2 days ago, came in to bail out Hurdle's dumbass for an inning. Perhaps the most dominating pitcher on the team sat out with a sandy vag. Congrats on losing the respect of many of your peers btw. I am sure they won't think anything about the effort they gave in a meaningless game while you "got better".
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Did you see those Idiots try to manage the NL? I told Hurdle our guys would get the shit done. Hey, I texted Rothschild and he said so. Plus, he told me, Big Z would be the only pitcher we would need.
So then I fell asleep after the 6th. Apparently we gave up the 2 run lead. My Cubs would never do that. But they told me Dumpster was going to pitch. Dusty texted me and told me it was okay. Even though he just pitched a couple days ago, Dusty said the more the better. And he was serious.
Dempster texted me and said he had closed before. Apparently last year? I don't remember. But I don't remember much about last year. No problem.
And then the Marmot? I told those fucks down at the league office I don't fucking roll Marmol on Tuesdays. Still, that dumbo-looking shit got it done.
I fell asleep after that. What? A Florida pitcher gave up the winning run? Didn't I used to pitch in Florida? Oh yeah, in Tampa Bay. Who? Longoria? I think I heard of that kid. I might have even been the manager when he got drafted.
Well, I gotta go mushroom stamp Selig until he realizes making the All-Star Game "count" is as smart as pitching Harang for 4 innings in relief after starting 2 days earlier. Thank God Dusty wasn't managing. I would have bitch-slapped that toothpick into the back of his skull.
I think I had too much to drink, I kinda got sloppy after the 1st paragraph. Never believe me while I'm in NY.
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